Sep 21, 2016 4 min read

Q.I’ve been thinking a lot about what’s happening in the world. I’m white. Can you help me figure out how to be an ally to my black friends? My social studies teacher says we’re living in interesting times. I don’t think he means that these are good times. I’m going to college next year. I don’t want to be someone who is apathetic. Thanks.

18-year-old

Mary Jo’s response: I was raised to believe each of us is worthy. I’m glad you’re drawn to support others, especially your friends of color. You’re on your way to responsible adulting; your question shows you will not be apathetic. As an ally, I often feel as you do. I want to transform our culture into one where all are respected. When your teacher says we are living in interesting times, he may be quoting Robert Kennedy. Kennedy stated in a 1966 speech, “There’s a Chinese curse which says, ‘May he live in interesting times.'” Although no Chinese source can be proven, the concept is relevant to your concern. I believe each person’s moral compass should guide toward an empathic awareness of others’ needs. Here are my thoughts on how to be an ally for racial justice.

1. Wake Up: Stop denying racism, stop making excuses.

2. Educate Yourself: Start with James Baldwin, W.E.B. DuBois, Richard Wright, Toni Morrison, Alice Walker, bell hooks or Ralph Ellison. Read “Between the World and Me” by T-Nehisi Coates. Study writings on intersectionality theory by Dr. Kimberle’ Crenshaw and critical race theory by Dr. Derrick Bell. Read “The New Jim Crow” by Michelle Alexander.

3. Speak Up: #NoMoreWhiteSilence. The black community is exhausted. It’s our turn.

4. Step Up, then Step Back: Do NOT take credit. Do NOT try to “fix” things. Do NOT say, “I don’t see color.” You do. Everyone does. Think of that statement. If I say I don’t see color, I do not see all of each person. If I say I don’t see color, I deny the uniqueness of each person of color.

5. Stand Strong: No matter how frustrated you become as an ally, your frustration is only a tiny fragment of the frustration people of color feel.

6. Understand Intersectionality: The connections among racism, economic issues, sexism and other injustices are real. Support others. Be there.

7. Notice Microaggressions: Racism is present every single day. Take note of who is in power in your school, in your community and next year in your college.

8. Witness: Every single time I present or teach, I share my role as an ally. Be a role model. Vote.

9. Take Care of Yourself: People of color do not need to explain racism to whites. Whites should not expect POC to comfort us when we wake up.

10. Take Risks: White privilege opens doors. Use it to advance the cause.

11. Listen: Listen to hear. Hold space for people of color.

12. Finally, and most important, live with respect. #EachPersonIsAPersonofWorth.