Nov 24, 2016 3 min read

So the batteries on the remote control in the family room were dead, and the channel was stuck on TLC. If I were able, I would have run to change the channel, but by then it was too late.

I was subjected to “Toddlers and Tiaras,” a reality show that chronicles the world of youth beauty pageants, those spectacles where cute 3-year-olds are bedazzled with makeup, hairspray, false eyelashes and false teeth; the goal is to make these happy, playful preschoolers look like grumpy, painted 30-year-olds.

As strange as the little girls look, the real spectacle can be found among the mothers. Where do they find these women? The pageant mothers tend to be cut from the same cloth: deeply focused stage mothers who spend enormous amounts of energy, time and money in the hunt for crowns that are far too large to even fit on their tiny daughters’ noggins. The mothers insist the children compete because they enjoy it, but on the episode I watched, there were a couple of sad toddlers pulling hot rollers out of their hair, saying they hated it.

Of course, the producers churn the pot, placing the mothers into contrived scenarios to encourage conflict. On the episode I watched, mothers from rival pageant teams (they have teams for this?) started jawing at each other after neither of their kids won the big prize. Soon enough, one threw water on the other, and the catfight began.

Water bottles figure heavily in all these mom-centric shows. “Dance Moms” sometimes ends with a cliffhanger showcasing splashed bottled water. On the “Real Housewives,” it’s vodka.

Reality TV is riddled with these mothers, women who are cast because they are unlikeable, and willing to display whatever catty, gossipy, insulting and sometimes violent behavior will get them a few extra minutes of screen time.

I’ve been around mothers all my life and have never known a single one who behaves like that. How did this harsh version of TV mothers start?

Let’s blame Disney. For 50 years, the Walt Disney studios have been churning out films without moms. Animated Disney features have long been the land of the motherless protagonist: Ariel, Belle, Peter Pan, Lilo and Stitch – they either had no mom or no parent at all. Snow White and Cinderella were even worse off, with those awful stepmothers. And we all know what happened to Bambi’s mother.

One theory holds that this tendency can be traced to Walt Disney having been undone by his own mother’s death. But I think it’s more likely the writers of the films – and the fairy tales they were based on – knew that functional, two-parent households don’t exactly make for great dramatic tension.

And so for years, the mothers were left on the cutting room floor, or omitted from the start. And now, the mothers are rising up to grab their screen time.

The train wreck of “Toddlers and Tiaras” had me staying to watch another episode. On this one, a little girl selected her gift from the wrong prize table, and the organizer scolded the mother. What followed was an epic display of tears, name calling and hurt feelings – from the mother. The daughter shrugged it off.

While the adult cried and gnashed her teeth, the lovely daughter kept her cool and batted her eyelashes. Isn’t that just like a princess?

Beth Dolinar can be reached at cootiej@aol.com.