Jul 16, 2018 7 min read

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This past weekend was quite an event for drive-in fans across America. The movie critic and TV personality best known for keeping the spirit of the drive-in alive, Joe Bob Briggs, made his return to hosting movies with a 24-hour marathon titled “The Last Drive-In” on the horror movie streaming service Shudder.

While Briggs adamantly claims that this would be his last foray into drive-in movie presenting on television, the response to the live streaming event was so strong that Shudder’s service crashed shortly after it kicked off at 9 p.m. Friday.

The good news is that because of Shudder’s server problems, they’ve reversed their plans to have this be a one-time-only stream and users can now stream the movies on-demand from their app. I highly recommend it, as Briggs brought the same level expertise and offbeat commentary as he did during the heyday as the host of TNT’s “Monstervision.” In fact, the entire thing felt like a grade-A recreation of the “Monstervision” format down to the font used for Joe Bob’s famed “Drive-In Totals.” Justin says check it out.

Fan response seemed to hint that Briggs might be making an announcement to make it regular gig, but by the end of the special, it seemed he was being truthful in his plan to retire.

However, we can help keep the spirit of drive-in movie reviews going here at Drive-In Time Machine and we’ll start with a film Joe Bob covered in his book “Profoundly Disturbing” that was playing at area drive-ins 60 years ago.

French-born director Roger Vadim’s career can best be explained as a man showing off his latest beautiful wife to the world via celluloid and “And God Created Woman” is the prime example of this stereotype.

Starring Brigette Bardot in the role that would make her a sex symbol, “And God Created Woman” is an drama that follows the erotic escapades of an 18-year-old orphan as she considers three different suitors.

Vadim’s other famed wife-starring film is “Barbarella,” where he showcased his then-spouse Jane Fonda in an erotic outer space face. He would later remake the film in 1988 with Rebecca De Mornay taking over the Bardot role, though he broke from tradition and cast De Mornay from a national search instead of his most-recent nuptial.

Condemned by the National Legion of Decency upon release in 1956, “And God Created Woman” was so controversial that police made attempts to suppress its screening in some parts of the U.S. However, that didn’t seem to be a problem for Washington and Greene counties. Advertisements printed in the Observer-Reporter show it plated at both the Sunset Drive-In in Washington and the Waynesburg Drive-In Theatre.

Sunset claimed to be the “first drive-in theater in this area” to show the feature – misspelled as “feaure” in the ad copy- along with “Apache Woman” as the b-picture. But the typo isn’t the only error. Waynesburg was playing the film a week earlier backed with “Gunslinger” and the late show “Voodoo Woman.”

Thirty-five years ago in 1963, Mt. Lebanon Drive-In in Canonsburg had double features on both screens that could’ve pleased both mainstream movie buffs and sci-fi fiends.

On screen one, Hitchcock’s classic thriller “The Birds” opened the night. Even Hitchcock himself proclaimed the film was “the most terrifying motion picture I have ever made” in the ad copy that ran in the Observer-Reporter on July 12, 1963.

After catching up on Hitch’s latest thriller, audiences could stick around for Marlon Brando in “The Ugly American,” which the ad claimed to be “the most important adventure of our time.”

Screen two opened up the Paramount release of “The Space Children” from Jack Arnold, best known as the director of “It Came From Outer Space” and “Creature from the Black Lagoon.” Despite Arnold’s previous prestige in science fiction film, “Children” came toward the end of the height of his theatrical career. After its release, Arnold mostly worked in television until his death in 1992.

While “Children” was a 1958 release coming out five years later, Mt. Lebanon audiences could stick around to see “War of the Worlds” and “Conquest of Space” all for one low price.

Forty years ago in 1978, Route 19 Drive-In debuted the star-studded eco-horror film “The Swarm” where African deadly bees wreak havoc on American cities. With big names like Michael Caine, Richard Chamberlain, Slim Pickins, Patty Duke, Henry Fonda and more, “The Swarm” is a fun slice of ’70s Hollywood schlock that fit in perfect at the drive-in or late-night movie shows. Audiences at Route 19 during the weekend of July 14, 1978, would’ve gotten to enjoy the latest Clint Eastwood “Dirty Harry” flick “The Enforcer” as the b-picture to this “bee-picture.”

Up the road at Mt. Lebanon, families could enjoy the latest Disney live-action comedies “The Cat from Outer Space” and “The Shaggy D.A.” on screen one, but they’d want to keep the kiddies away from the second screen where a raunchy, R-rated double feature was on display.

Starting out the night on screen two was the French erotic comedy “Attention les yeux!” While Google Translate says that title means “warning the eyes” in English, the U.S. distributors went with the much more explanatory “Let’s Make a Dirty Movie” – as the film is a comedy about a bumbling film crew trying to make a porno movie – kind of like ones that usually played the second screen at Mt. Lebo. The second film was “The Teasers,” an Italian sexploitation film about a beautiful schoolgirl tempting her male classmates and teachers.

We’ve been across three decades already, but while we’re taking a trip in time, why not stop off at 1988 and see what was playing? Skyview Drive-In in Carmichaels, Greene County, had “Crocodile Dundee II” and “Big Business” on screen one.

“Dundee” was a hit at the box office, but this sequel didn’t find the surprise critical success as its predecessor. In fact, it’s hard to believe these days that the original “Crocodile Dundee” was a critical darling, so much so that star Paul Hogan and co-writers John Cornell and Ken Shadie were nominated for a Best Original Screenplay Oscar.

As forgettable as the “put another shrimp on the barbie” guy’s Oscar prospects is the second feature on this double bill. “Big Business” offers not only Bette Midler and Lily Tomlin showing off their comedic chops, but also has dual roles from both of the comediennes. But this comedy helmed by “Airplane” co-director Jim Abrahams is the type of lame dud you’d find playing on cable TV in the middle of a Sunday afternoon.

Screen two at Skyview fared a bit better with the Ron Howard fantasy feature “Willow” followed by Cher’s Oscar-nominated turn in the comedy “Moonstruck.” While “Willow” bombed at the box office, it’s a film that’s worthy of re-evaluation and certainly would’ve been more fun to watch outdoors than a bland comedy pairing. Plus, you’d be able to catch up on an Oscar movie. 

I could keep going through drive-in lineups until the sun comes up, so let’s call it quits for another week’s edition of Drive-In Time Machine. Next week, we’ll look at a classic ’90s Halloween movie that was strangely released mid-summer and a classic ’70s comedy-drama that is set during the 1920s.