Nov 19, 2018 3 min read

Wednesday, Nov. 7, I had jury duty. And yes, the word duty still makes me laugh when I hear it out loud.

Having to report to the courthouse the day after the election seemed like punishment for voting. After we watched a short video about the importance of exercising your civic duty (hee hee), I felt better about it. I was serving my country, without having to go to war.

This was the third time I had been called. The second time in the city of Pittsburgh. Once in Los Angeles.

• Side note: Back in L.A., I looked around the room of the courthouse and I saw a guy who looked like Captain B.J. Hunnicutt from TV’s “MASH,” and, sure enough, it was actor Mike Farrell. I noticed while living in Southern California that if someone looked like a celebrity, they usually were.

But I digress, like I do. Even though it was my third time for jury duty (ha!), I still made a rookie mistake. I did not bring a book or a phone charger.

I often say, “Boredom is the state of limited imagination.” That aphorism, however, was put to the test waiting around the courthouse all day.

I was the very last juror, number 45. They only needed 12 or so. Thirty-four people would have to be disqualified before they got to me. Still, as they winnowed down potential jurors, I felt like someone who was sliding into home plate while the ball hurtled toward the catcher’s mitt.

Safe!

Even after I knew I wasn’t selected, I had to hang around until I was officially dismissed. They really stretched it out. My phone was on 3 percent. My own energy was about that low. Doing nothing is exhausting.

I was leaving when I realized my name tag was still adhered to my shirt. I ripped it off as I was went through the revolving door. I dropped the paper.

Never wanting to be a litterbug, especially in the courthouse, I rode around the revolving door again and went back for it. Do you know how hard it is to bend down and pick up a scrap of paper while a revolving door is still revolving? It didn’t help matters that it was the end of the day and everyone was leaving at once.

I’m pretty sure the security guard thought I was a nut job, as I twirled around a few times trying to pick up a scrap of paper. P.S. It was sticky on one side!

I bumped my head on the third spin, because someone was pushing too fast. I don’t blame him. He was probably trying to catch a bus. I did, however, yell, “Hold please!” as I whirled around.

I was bending down and moving forward, bouncing into the glass partitioned door as people pushed through. I got a little dizzy.

Finally, I retrieved the crumpled piece of paper.

I managed to get through jury duty with only a few bumps and bruises.