Nov 7, 2016 4 min read

According to a Sean Ross article last week, radio has greatly harmed itself by obliterating the first few seconds of songs with needless talking, station jingles or low sound levels. Ross mentioned radio stepping on such memorable opening riffs as the woman’s laugh on “Hungry Like the Wolf,” the immediately identifiable first few notes of “Satisfaction” and “You’re So Vain” and the “cold” start to “Sexual Healing” and David Bowie’s “Let’s Dance.”

Indeed, opening hooks can deter a listener’s impulse to change the radio station.

TV networks should take note.

It’s been said that “Gilligan’s Island” became a hit primarily because of its catchy theme song. That same argument could be made for “Bonanza,” “All in the Family” and “Cheers” – not because the shows were “Gilligan”-bad, but rather because they all began as low-rated series before blossoming into mega-hits. Could it have been their hummable theme songs that did the trick?

I mention this because of three unlikely hits on CBS’s current TV schedule: “Hawaii 5-0,” “MacGyver” and “The Odd Couple.” All, of course, are remakes of vintage series, and all make use of the original theme songs. None of the new versions was predicted to be around long – especially the revamped “Odd Couple” – yet all are doing well, and, at least sporadically, using the full theme music. Could that be their secret weapon?

Keep in mind that “The Big Bang Theory” is perhaps the only other current series on network TV to use a protracted theme song – and it’s been the top-rated network comedy for years.

So why did TV theme songs disappear? As sitcoms expanded to an average of seven to nine minutes of commercials, and dramas became weighed down with 15 to 17 minutes of ads, something had to go, and networks evidently thought theme songs were expendable.

Big mistake.

Beyond initially drawing viewers to a series, theme songs can establish mood and intent. The “Hill Street Blues” theme, for instance, aptly conveyed the somber, reflective tone of the series, as did the more pulsating, urgent imagery created by the defiant drumbeats of “NYPD Blue.”

Themes for “Friends,” “Mary Tyler Moore,” “The Beverly Hillbillies” and “The Brady Bunch” were more than catchy; they were a one-minute synopsis of the show.

Moreover, themes serve as a weekly welcome mat to viewers. Without them, shows can seem to be just one of so many similar homes in a housing plan.

Theme songs also establish a comfort zone for viewers. It didn’t matter much what was happening that particular week; the irresistible lure of the gentle “Newhart” theme encouraged millions to make a weekly visit to the Vermont Inn.

It’s also telling that so many TV themes became hit records. They include “Bad Boys” (from “Cops”), “Dragnet,” “The Greatest American Hero (Believe It Or Not)”, “Happy Days,” “Hawaii 5-0,” “Hill Street Blues,” “How Do You Talk To An Angel” (“The Heights”), “Makin’ It,” “Miami Vice Theme,” Mission Impossible,” “Peter Gunn,” “The Rockford Files,” “S.W.A.T.,” “Secret Agent Man,” “Three Stars Will Shine Tonight” (“Dr. Kildare”) and “Welcome Back Kotter.” Those, by the way, are just the tunes that made the top 10.

It’s not overstatement to say that TV theme songs have become part of the American fabric. How many times has the “Addams Family” double snap blared over loudspeakers at sporting events? How often have the first few notes of “Mission Impossible” signaled a derring-do event in movies? How frequently do you mention wanting to go to a place “where everybody knows your name?”

Nostalgia? Sure. But show themes might just be a key ingredient in bringing the masses back to network television. Cue the tossed salad and scrambled eggs.

Networks don’t officially announce cancellations, anymore, but ABC’s “Notorious” appears to be the first cut of the season. Its order was reduced to a total of 10 episodes, which will take it to the end of the month. More than likely, ABC will fill the Thursday hole with holiday specials in December. “Scandal” is expected to return to the lineup in January.

The second cancellation might well be NBC’s “Timeless.” Although it received an order for three more episodes, that will just take it through February, when it will be replaced by a TV version of the movie “Taken.” “Timeless” ratings aren’t bad, especially when DVR viewing is factored in, but NBC evidently expects more from a series given the post-“Voice” slot. Then again, if “Taken” tanks, “Timeless” may well be a better option for a second season.