Jun 22, 2017 3 min read

Q.

I had you for sex-ed in high school and your class was the best I’ve ever had! My family moved after I graduated. I have two siblings – one in middle school and one in high school. Their school has no sex-ed at all, so I try to teach them. I’m in my last year of law school. Over the weekend I heard from an old high school friend. She tells me you’ve done a lesson plan about the Michele Carter verdict. Can you share your thoughts about it? I worry that my sibs don’t understand the seriousness of texting and social media. I follow your column online. Your thoughts on “13 Reasons Why” helped me with my sibs, both of whom watched it. Thanks so much for continuing to teach me.

26-year-old

Mary Jo’s response: How nice to be remembered! Thank you for your kind words. I’m glad you’re mentoring your siblings. I’m sure you’ve noticed a difference in their cultures; the last decade’s increasing social media access has created a group of young people for whom cyberspace is a very real entity. I often think online life is more important to some than real life.

Yes, I did create a lesson plan on the Michele Carter verdict. Staying current is key to connection, and I’m pleased when I can raise awareness about suicide prevention and cyberbullying. Michele Carter was 17 in 2014 when she texted her boyfriend, Conrad Roy III, encouraging him to go through with a suicide attempt. Last week, she was convicted of involuntary manslaughter, and awaits sentencing in August.

As a law student, I’m sure you are more aware of the legality of this case, and the precedent it sets for our culture. I created the lesson plan to underscore the seriousness of online communication, not to debate the constitutionality of the verdict. Our young people can connect with their peers in seconds; my goal is to help them realize the far-reaching implications of those messages and pictures. Once sent, they remain in cyberspace, can affect others negatively, and can impact a young person’s future employment and life.

Important concepts in my lesson:

1. Suicide is a tragedy. Sensationalizing it in shows like “13 Reasons Why” and over social media doesn’t aid prevention.

2. Our words matter. What we say to others can lift their spirits and empower them to succeed, or add to their depression or anxiety.

3. Depression and social anxiety are real. Ignoring young people’s needs isn’t healthy. Counseling helps. Education helps. Trusted adults help. Peers can help others.

4. Proactive is better than reactive. Educating young people to know how to respond to a friend’s suicidal ideation can be life-affirming. Our staff offers a four-week class series on sexting and cyberbullying called “It’s Complicated”; it stresses empathy, consequences and healing.

The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline is available 24/7 at 1-800-273-8255.

I’ll be happy to continue talking with you; strong advocates like you help my teaching extend beyond our community. Thank you again.

Have a question? Send it to Dr. Mary Jo Podgurski’s email podmj@healthyteens.com.