Dec 10, 2020 5 min read

Q. I’m not a teenager, not even close but, like you, I believe our youth are the future and must be nurtured. I wonder if you can address something that upsets me terribly. As we know Dr Rachel Levine is transgender. She’s also a brilliant infectious disease expert. When her recommendations are posted, the disrespectful comments outnumber the ones who value her advice. I’m sure the youth in your group will be much more tolerable and understanding of those who identify sexually outside the norm. I would appreciate your insight and theirs.

Concerned adult

Mary Jo’s Response: Thank you for respecting young people’s voices. Like adults, they are all unique. I avoid generalizing teens. I also try to avoid political discussions unless teens bring up the topic. We then operate under a “debate without hate” philosophy of respect.

Before we begin, please let me clarify, gender identity is not sexual identity. A person’s gender is not the same as their sexual attraction.

You asked for my insight. I can respond with confidence. Hatred is wrong. I was raised to offer dignity and respect to all people by a man who was bullied as a 14-year-old immigrant. My father’s example gave me the gift of acceptance. He told me I could judge another human the morning I woke up perfect and that would never happen. He said only God was perfect. His lessons echo. I honor Dr. Levine. She is worthy.

There is no excuse for comments like the ones you describe. Disagreeing with someone should not lead to degrading words or hate. Gender is part of an individual’s identity and should be respected.

Our peer educators embrace my belief of #EachPersonIsAPersonofWorth. They learn how to respect, to listen and to facilitate before they create curricula to teach their peers. I am incredibly proud of them. Even amid virtual classes and the pandemic, they prepare their sessions with passion and commit to every workshop they teach. Their most recent virtual workshop was Coping with COVID and was outstanding.

I asked more than 30 young people for their thoughts on your question. It was well received. There were so many comments I could have filled three columns.

Peer Educator/Alumni Response: Why worry about someone’s gender when you should be focusing on their work?

It’s frustrating that just because she is trans, people think her opinion is not valid, despite her amazing credentials. People should be more accepting of those trying to help, even if they are different from their “norm.” Being different from someone else doesn’t mean they don’t deserve respect.

A good portion of young people like us are more understanding and accepting. It’s all about how people are raised. We know families where it is common to see no one wearing a mask. We know people who actually force their kids to not wear a mask, and if they do, and get caught wearing one, they get a lecture or are punished.

A lot of the hateful things directed at her are from political bias. People attack Dr. Levine with whatever they can to make her words seem useless. People seem to pick out a person’s attributes and use them against the person. An individual’s identity has nothing to do with their wisdom, education, or intelligence.

The hatred toward Dr. Levine is extensive. It is a disgrace the way she is treated, but it exemplifies a rise in hatred toward transgender individuals and their allies. These people who post hate thoroughly misunderstand the basics of human and constitutional rights. Perhaps there is no real answer to this question if people refuse to believe that language hurts. What if this language fuels those who would do evil deeds? Moral compasses need restored. No one should be attacked or receive death threats for doing their job.

Why do people say things like that in such a context? Are they looking for excuses to not accept her advice or do they hear something they do not like? Would they accept the same opinions if they came from a cisgender woman or a person who identified like them, or would they still say hateful things? There is nothing wrong with disagreement. There is something wrong with flat out hate and threats.

How would the people making these hateful comments respond to Dr. Levine in person? Perhaps some would be hateful, but a lot of hate comes from people hiding behind a computer. We talked about bullying in school. Adults bully too.

This kind of behavior is disrespectful and lacks empathy. End of story.

Have a question? Send it to Dr. Mary Jo Podgurski’s email podmj@healthyteens.com.