Jun 23, 2023 4 min read

The e-mail came as a shock, although it shouldn’t have.

Now that the pandemic is mostly over, it’s time to ease back into the office. We will be dipping a toe into the office swimming pool, doing a couple of in-person shifts every week, a reasonable request, but geez.

My first thought: What the heck did I used to wear to work? Back in March 2020, when the world turned off the office lights, we didn’t know this would last three years. I remember a phone call with my son in California. He said he was hearing the shutdown might continue for three months or more. I assured him it wouldn’t be that long.

So now here I am, almost 40 months later, having to relearn a few things about office life.

While I’ve worked full-time along, I wasn’t in the office every day. Producing documentaries I was out and about with film crews. Hair in pony tail under a ball cap, jeans, sneakers and this one white shirt that never let me down. The same shirt (short sleeves, cotton, button-down) saw me through hundreds of Zoom calls. Once, when it was in the laundry, I wore something blue and when I signed onto the screen I didn’t recognize myself.

The first day back felt like every first day of any new job I’ve ever had. I was up early to decide what to wear, a task that sent me into my walk-in closet to have a look around. For all those work-at-home years I mostly picked through the heap of yoga pants that never seemed to make it into the drawers. A friend who was headed back to work shared a concern that her feet might not fit into actual shoes any more. Like her feet, our whole bodies may have gone soft and, perhaps, larger.

Beside what to wear, there are other concerns. What did I used to do about lunch? Did I pack a brown bag? I honestly have no mental picture of eating anything at my desk, but I must have, right? Those were long days.

And what about the challenges of being at a desk all day? While working from home, I would write for a few hours, walk the dog, do a Zoom call, make a smoothie for lunch, check the news, do another Zoom call. And to be honest, there were days I would go lie down for a 20-minute catnap. OK, 30-minute catnap. I added, “What if I get sleepy?,” to my list of back-to-work concerns.

And that commute. I moved to the other side of town, a decision made in the final days of the pandemic, and I can’t say whether I chose the location fully aware of what the commute would mean when driving in every day. Traffic can be a bear, both going and coming out – especially now that everyone else is headed back to the office.

My first day back was strange but sweet, because I got to see the full-length versions of all my co-workers who I’d only seen from the shoulders up on a screen. It was a revelation to see them walking around.

On that day, I wore a non-white shirt, new sneakers and pants I unearthed from the closet. I took yogurt and a banana for lunch. When I finally settled in to my desk, I opened the side drawer and found a granola bar I’d left there all those years ago. It was still fresh.

Beth Dolinar can be reached at cootiej@aol.com.