May 30, 2024 3 min read

Q. I graduate soon. Is it normal to feel this sad? During the pandemic, all I could think of was finishing high school. I thought of school as drudgery, as something to endure. Since then, I found sports and theater, which is a bit of a contrast. I love both. I’m not going to play pro sports or win an Academy Award someday, but I found people like me who helped me grow. I connected with teachers who saw good things in me. This last year I’ve written so many college essays and completed scholarship applications. I’m accepted at the college I hoped to attend. I know it’s normal to have bittersweet feelings about leaving high school and friends, but my sadness is so deep and real. I doubt I’ll get through the ceremony without tears. – 18-year-old

Mary Jo’s Response: Change can be challenging.

I’m pleased you were able to move past your negative feelings about school and thrive. The pandemic was difficult for just about everyone – parents, teachers and students were relieved when it ended. You moved forward in the best way possible, by getting involved. I love the way you followed your interests. I don’t think liking both the arts and sports is a contrast; I think it’s a sign of a well-rounded person.

Bittersweet feelings are typical at graduations. You are leaving a safe environment where you know teachers and have friends to move into a whole new experience. It is exciting but it is also scary. You can do this.

Trust your own strength. You will miss friends and the security of high school but you will make new and even stronger friends in college, while enlarging your perspective and increasing your knowledge.

I wish you joy and health and a wonderful summer in preparation for your first college adventure. If you shed a tear at graduation, you won’t be alone. I’m a fan of the show “Ted Lasso.” One of my favorite sayings from the show is: “I promise you there’s something worse than being sad, and that’s being alone and being sad.” Share your sadness with your parents and friends, just as you did with me.

Congratulations on graduation.

Peer Educator Response: Some of us graduate next year. We think it is very normal to feel as you do. High school is something that grows on you in a bittersweet way. You find things to enjoy so you can get through and when it all comes to an end and it hits you that it’s over. Plus, school is something you’ve been attending for literally years. It’s a hard change all of a sudden. You talked about the pandemic. Most of us hated online classes during the lockdown. It’s better in person. Your sadness will pass. You’re just attached to things you know. Good luck.

Have a question? Send it to Dr. Mary Jo Podgurski’s email podmj@healthyteens.com.