OP-ED: Kindness is not weakness
As a young boy, my body began to reject fat. It had become indigestible for me. In fact, it may actually be some type of Jack Sprat Syndrome. This condition is not dissimilar to another unnamed syndrome that I have acquired, and that is my inability to continue to embrace negativity.
When the daily news reaches level four whitewater status, my lack of desire to navigate those rapids does as well. Because of that rejection of wallowing in negativity, I developed a unique ability over my five decades of continuous employment the ability to acutely observe leadership skills. I looked to those in charge, embraced their positive traits, and immediately rejected their flaws.
When teaching in the early 1970s, I discovered a book, “I’m Okay. You’re Okay.” This book teaches that treating people as adults with respect and kindness will yield much better results than interacting with them in a parent to child manner. Let me repeat that in a different way. Being nice and respectful to people can lead to them being nice and respectful to you and to others. And it is important that we always try to find a way to allow them to save face.
It became exceedingly clear to me that providing a happier and healthier workplace was the key to all of our successes. How does one make life richer, more meaningful, more secure, and more rewarding? The answer to these questions will make all the difference in the world for every person involved.
There have been untold numbers of articles, books, and speeches regarding these topics, but we need to commit to these changes rather dramatically and start our own positive revolution to be unleashed internationally. That is the only way we can make this movement become the dominant reality anytime soon.
As leaders, we have a choice to either make life harder or to make it better. Our leadership decisions are the basis for making these changes, and more valid information is emerging every day that indicates that our lives will not only be happier, but they will also be healthier because of it. Our personal relationship scores will also improve, our turnover rates will diminish, and employees will live longer, healthier lives, while overall legal and medical costs will decrease.
Several experts have determined that health-damaging stress comes from a feeling of lack of control in our daily lives, in our relationships, and in our work; a lack of access, a lack of meaningful, fulfilling, rewarding experiences, and a lack of support from those to whom we report. People usually don’t resign because of the job. They resign because of their immediate bosses.
Last month I visited a sick friend. He was a patient at a well-respected medical center. While walking in the direction of the cafeteria, I noticed a television with a single slide displayed on it. That screen read, “Striving to reach a 65.1 percent mean score in employee satisfaction.” As a CEO, it was always my personal belief that anything below a 95% employee satisfaction rating would be indicative of a serious failure of leadership.
How does one achieve a 95+ percent satisfaction rating? People must feel valued, secure, respected, and appreciated. They need to experience kind excellence in the workplace from servant leaders. None of this can be accomplished by management through fear. Common goals must be clearly established. Communication at all levels must be ongoing and transparent. Because an environment of respect is paramount to success, bullying in the workplace cannot be tolerated.
One of the very most important things you need to remember is kindness is not weakness. Yes, there need to be clear lines, clear boundaries, clear rules, but respect, dignity, and transparent communications all lead to enhanced relationship satisfaction and that satisfaction leads to customer or patient satisfaction and retention. That’s a positive, recurring circle that works.
Nick Jacobs of Windber is a health-care consultant and author of two books.